Yet another post about the 'T', the boarder at my acreage. I said wasn't going to make these 'rant' posts a habit but things just keep popping up and I'm pretty much done with it (both the rants and the boarding situation.)
On several occasions I have given T a choice on where to keep D: in the pen by himself in which case he needs to be fed twice a day or in the big pasture with my guys in which case he needs to be caught out there in the wide open spaces; he's not exactly amenable to being caught at times. One such occasion was when I was going out of town for the weekend and I would not be around to feed him. She agreed that he should go out to pasture, she doesn't have time to feed him ... but I am to bring him back in when I return (it wasn't phrased as a request, as in "would you mind?, thanks, really appreciate your help"; it was an expectation and an implication that I am responsible for this inconvenient situation.) So much for relying on her help when I need it.
I am really not keen on the horses being in the small pasture because it has gotten to be *very* grazed down; I underestimated how quickly the grass would be consumed so this was my fault. Its to the point where I don't know if it will recover anytime soon. T and I had a conversation about this 2 days ago and only D was allowed access to that area (my way of compromising on the "can't catch him in the big pasture" thing) but somehow all the horses found a way in there (either a gate was left open or they managed to jimmy the latch which is entirely possible.)
On the weekend, T complained that the horses were on the far side of the coulee and her hubby spent 45 minutes trying to catch them.
Yesterday D was again out in the pasture with my guys. I received this text:
"Can you bring D in if your out this morning please and thank you (smiley face)."
Now maybe I am taking this out of context but it felt like I was being "voluntold" (I think I know how her hubby felt on the weekend!) I brought D in as she asked, partly because I am a spineless wimp and partly because I wanted to see for myself how difficult it was to catch them (any of them, catch one and they will all follow). It took a bit of effort, had to cross over to the far side but eventually D came to the oats pail, I haltered him and away we went. Less than 15 minutes. I responded back to her that I did it this time but:
"I can't be doing that every day though, I'm late for work."
Her reply: "Lol that was my complaint too. Can't spend an hour casing them Lol".
REALLY?! So its too much of a bother for you to catch your own horse but no problem sending me out to waste an hour of my time ... chasing your horse? I was already feeling a bit miffed and with that, I had enough. I hardly even saw my guys because I spent all of my limited time on D.
I was in a bit of a hurry to get to work and I probably hit the send button without really thinking it through fully, but I texted that I strongly suggested that she consider boarding D somewhere that is more suitable for her needs. I tried to frame it in such a way that she would see that my place really isn't the best for what she wants to do, which is the honest truth. I have few real 'facilities' (which is part of the reason I am charging her only nominal board) and she needs more help with D than I can provide, nor do I want to provide. I am not a "full board" place. Of the few things I do have to offer (pasture, riding arena) she doesn't use. She doesn't seem to notice (or maybe she ignores) subtleties but she caught my drift on that message. In a bit of a pout (again, maybe the context is lost via text), asked that I give her a few days, she'll get him out of there. As well, she wants half of this month's board back (no mention of the week and a half in August that D was there that I didn't charge her for.) I agreed to refund that because, again, I'm a bit spineless and she succeeded in making me feel bad for hurting her feelings. I am going to chalk it up to lessons learned and the price of getting back my peaceful sanctuary.
After all that, she didn't even go out there yesterday to see him which was the whole reason this started! She did go out in the evening since D was still in the pen and needed to be fed, I'll give her credit for being switched on enough to remember that. I wasn't planning on going out but I changed my mind and decided to take a drive out there before I went home that night. Low and behold, the gate to the small pasture was open and all of them were grazing on it. She either didn't get the subtle hint or ignored it.
It just feels like a constant barrage of 'things' with this arrangement. I did a quick calculation this morning: I came up with a list of about 18 'things' (not counting yesterday) that have transpired in the ~7 weeks she's been there, it works out to something every 2.73 days. Way too much drama!
On several occasions I have given T a choice on where to keep D: in the pen by himself in which case he needs to be fed twice a day or in the big pasture with my guys in which case he needs to be caught out there in the wide open spaces; he's not exactly amenable to being caught at times. One such occasion was when I was going out of town for the weekend and I would not be around to feed him. She agreed that he should go out to pasture, she doesn't have time to feed him ... but I am to bring him back in when I return (it wasn't phrased as a request, as in "would you mind?, thanks, really appreciate your help"; it was an expectation and an implication that I am responsible for this inconvenient situation.) So much for relying on her help when I need it.
I am really not keen on the horses being in the small pasture because it has gotten to be *very* grazed down; I underestimated how quickly the grass would be consumed so this was my fault. Its to the point where I don't know if it will recover anytime soon. T and I had a conversation about this 2 days ago and only D was allowed access to that area (my way of compromising on the "can't catch him in the big pasture" thing) but somehow all the horses found a way in there (either a gate was left open or they managed to jimmy the latch which is entirely possible.)
On the weekend, T complained that the horses were on the far side of the coulee and her hubby spent 45 minutes trying to catch them.
Yesterday D was again out in the pasture with my guys. I received this text:
"Can you bring D in if your out this morning please and thank you (smiley face)."
Now maybe I am taking this out of context but it felt like I was being "voluntold" (I think I know how her hubby felt on the weekend!) I brought D in as she asked, partly because I am a spineless wimp and partly because I wanted to see for myself how difficult it was to catch them (any of them, catch one and they will all follow). It took a bit of effort, had to cross over to the far side but eventually D came to the oats pail, I haltered him and away we went. Less than 15 minutes. I responded back to her that I did it this time but:
"I can't be doing that every day though, I'm late for work."
Her reply: "Lol that was my complaint too. Can't spend an hour casing them Lol".
REALLY?! So its too much of a bother for you to catch your own horse but no problem sending me out to waste an hour of my time ... chasing your horse? I was already feeling a bit miffed and with that, I had enough. I hardly even saw my guys because I spent all of my limited time on D.
I was in a bit of a hurry to get to work and I probably hit the send button without really thinking it through fully, but I texted that I strongly suggested that she consider boarding D somewhere that is more suitable for her needs. I tried to frame it in such a way that she would see that my place really isn't the best for what she wants to do, which is the honest truth. I have few real 'facilities' (which is part of the reason I am charging her only nominal board) and she needs more help with D than I can provide, nor do I want to provide. I am not a "full board" place. Of the few things I do have to offer (pasture, riding arena) she doesn't use. She doesn't seem to notice (or maybe she ignores) subtleties but she caught my drift on that message. In a bit of a pout (again, maybe the context is lost via text), asked that I give her a few days, she'll get him out of there. As well, she wants half of this month's board back (no mention of the week and a half in August that D was there that I didn't charge her for.) I agreed to refund that because, again, I'm a bit spineless and she succeeded in making me feel bad for hurting her feelings. I am going to chalk it up to lessons learned and the price of getting back my peaceful sanctuary.
After all that, she didn't even go out there yesterday to see him which was the whole reason this started! She did go out in the evening since D was still in the pen and needed to be fed, I'll give her credit for being switched on enough to remember that. I wasn't planning on going out but I changed my mind and decided to take a drive out there before I went home that night. Low and behold, the gate to the small pasture was open and all of them were grazing on it. She either didn't get the subtle hint or ignored it.
It just feels like a constant barrage of 'things' with this arrangement. I did a quick calculation this morning: I came up with a list of about 18 'things' (not counting yesterday) that have transpired in the ~7 weeks she's been there, it works out to something every 2.73 days. Way too much drama!
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